Discovering the power of ‘with’!

What does it mean to be ‘with,’ or to go ‘with out’ and what happens when we ‘with hold’? Learn how to create a truly accessible world via the incredible power of ‘with’.

Redwood trees are uniquely connected ‘with’ each other, their roots intertwining with the other Redwoods, literally holding each other up.

Two years ago, after a sudden heart attack, and during one of our many COVID lockdowns, I became obsessed with what on the surface, appears to be a very unassuming word, and that word was ‘with’.

I had first been introduced to its super powers in 2017, by my Seattle-based friend, and amazing design disrupter, Jeanine Spence. She had shared a design framework that highlighted the differences between designing ‘to’, ‘for’ and ‘with’ traditionally marginalised communities.

My colleague Megan and I could immediately see the correspondences between her design approach, and our then recently-formed Possibility spectrum. The Possibility spectrum strives to present 3 world views, or lenses, through which ‘accessibility’ can be viewed: the lenses of Disability, Accessibility and Possibility.

A new understanding of accessibility

Because most of our society operates back in the disability and/or accessibility part of the spectrum, design approaches tend to assume the often well-meaning but inherently patronising approach of designing ‘to’ or ‘for’ access communities. I rarely see people and processes adopting a true ‘with’ approach, even amongst those operating in the wider access space. So it was little wonder that this small, but incredibly potent word ‘with’ got under my skin, niggling at me day and night.

And then in 2021, whilst recovering from my heart attack, the niggle became an obsession. Before long, I had somehow created, or more accurately discovered, a ‘with’ method of thinking and behaving – a way of understanding what accessibility truly means to me, in the 21st century. I felt I had found a critical missing ingredient, a pivotal key to being able to state what is needed to create a truly accessible world.

There are 3 fundamental aspects to understanding ‘with’ and its role in advancing greater access. These are:

• What does it mean to be ‘with’?

• What does it mean to go ‘with out’?

• What happens when we ‘with hold’?

One of the risks of breathing new life into a word that is both well-known and generally considered to be well understood, is how challenging it can be to suspend that ‘knowing’, to park that earlier definition and then to allow the time and space to really welcome in and explore something entirely new.

Well, that is what I now invite you to do.  Please put everything you thought you knew about ‘with’ to one side and open yourself up to the following, with courage and gentleness.

The emergence of a new meaning

Growing very close together, Redwoods are dependent on each other for nutrients. Only Redwoods have the strength & ability to support other Redwoods.

The meaning I invite you to explore began its life in Old German. Back then, the word ‘with’ was associated with childbirth and more specifically, being a midwife.  ‘With’ in this context is about midwifery, about supporting childbirth, and about the emergence of new life into the world.

Fundamental to this definition is the understanding that both mother and midwife are primarily focused on a life that is separate and beyond themselves. Everything in that moment is about birthing that new being, this ‘third party’ if you like. In many ways, it requires everyone else to put their needs and egos to one side and to give over to this new baby entering the world.  Of course, during this birthing process it is also essential that the mother is well supported and cared for; the mother and the baby’s wellbeing are inextricably linked.  Everyone else’s’ needs or desires are secondary at this time - they must go ‘without’ in order for the focus and support to stay on mother and child.

If anyone refuses to play their part or refuses to provide care, the lives of the mother and baby may be placed at risk. In other words, if the midwife, the doctor, the father or other parent, ‘with holds’ care or expertise, a safe birth might not happen - and someone may die.

The birth of a fairer, better world #with

In my experience of social change - and as someone very familiar with what it takes to birth new ideas, programmes and organisations to advance a more accessible world - I now know that ‘with holding’ during the birth of anything, including social change, can have detrimental and far reaching consequences.  Yes, ‘with holding’, is what is going on everyday in every country around the world. ‘With holding’ is what is holding back the emergence of true equality for access citizens.

Day after day society is ‘with holding’ the birth of an accessible future. Is that what we want?

Day after day society refuses to support the birth of innovations and ways of being in the world that would enable the 1 million+ New Zealanders, and 2 billion people worldwide with access needs to flourish and lead lives of dignity.

Well this is not what I want. I want a world where we support access innovators and leaders to birth ideas and ways of being, including designing new technology, new approaches to learning, an economy, art & culture that are truly accessible. In other words, I want you to choose to be ’with’ me, to be ‘with’ us!

I invite you to support the birth of a fairer better world, a world full of ‘with citizens’ people who understand the power of generosity and supporting access leaders and innovators to advance a fairer and more equitable world for all.  Yes, this may mean having to sometimes go ‘with out’ power and control, and to let go of the familiar - but what magic may result from this small act of sacrifice?  What might then be possible for human kind?

‍#WITH
Thank you to the Remarkable Tech Summit for giving me the time and space to write this blog and to launch #with to the world. Thank your for modelling what it means to be truly deeply ‘with’!
Minnie b www.minnieb.co.nz

This is just the beginning of my blogs on #with and other similarly interesting emergent ideas. So do keep connected ‘with’ me if you are also keen to explore more over the coming weeks, months and years.